solovei: (OPM - ok.)
[personal profile] solovei
 So um.

My mother phoned a few hours ago to let me know that my grandfather has passed away. Apparently my aunt phoned early this morning to deliver the news. 

Death is a weird thing, and there's been so much of it in the news lately (Bowie, Alan Rickman, etc). I haven't seen my grandfather in many many years. After we moved to Canada in 2001, I'd only seen him once in person, and even that was six years ago if not more. Our interactions over the phone consisted mostly of me saying "I'm doing well" in my not-that-great Russian and him asking me when I'm getting married. (Needless to say I'm not out to any of my extended family).

So, I don't really feel very sad right now, and that concerns me somewhat. Am I a bad person? My life has been so removed from these people for so long that it almost doesn't intersect at all. I cried a lot when my cat died back in April, and in some respects I'm still very sad about that, but I can't really bring myself to be terribly moved by my grandfather's passing. It seems distant, like something you read in a book. If nothing else I just feel kind of awkward. What should I do? What do people do in this kind of situation? I tossed in some more laundry, made nachos for lunch, and started the dishwasher. There isn't much else I can do, really. There's no possible way we can make it in time for the funeral, being on the other side of the world. 

I wonder what will happen to the birds though. My grandfather kept a flock of fancy pigeons for as long as I've known him, so I hope they will find a good home. 


(no subject)

Date: Jan. 19th, 2016 09:10 pm (UTC)
yuuago: (A Redtail's Dream - Comfort)
From: [personal profile] yuuago
Oh dear.

Well... since you haven't had close interactions, it sounds like your reaction is normal, to me. Hell, even if you had, not being very sad at first is perfectly normal.

(no subject)

Date: Jan. 19th, 2016 09:33 pm (UTC)
pameluke: (Default)
From: [personal profile] pameluke
My condolences.
There's no set way to tell you how to feel. There's no obligation to feel a certain amount of sad, and what level of emotion is serious enough.
Just feel how you feel!



solovei: (Default)


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